A Fairy Tale
I came across this fairy tale when I first started to appreciate Transaction Analysis (TA). The story has always been a poignant reminder of how, whether we like it or not, we touch the very fabric of other people’s lives by our very presence, in ways perhaps we are unaware of or don’t appreciate.
So, after you have read and enjoyed the story, I hope you make all sorts of connections with the important things in your life. You may relect and ask yourself: how many fuzzies do you give away or keep back? What’s your fuzzy count? What’s the balance between fuzzies and pricklies? Or is this all too fuzzy and just prickly poppycock?
The story begins ……….Once upon a time a long time ago, there lived two very happy people called Tim and Mary with two children called John and Lucy. To understand how happy they were you have to understand how things were in those days.
You see in those happy days everyone was given at birth a small soft fuzzy bag. Anytime anyone reached into this bag they were able to pull out a Warm Fuzzy. Warm fuzzies were very much in demand because whenever somebody was given a warm fuzzy that felt warm and fuzzy all over. People who didn’t get warm fuzzies regularly were in danger of developing a sickness in their back which caused them to shrivel up and die.
In those days it was very easy to get Warm fuzzies. Any time that somebody felt like e it, they might walk up to you and say ‘I’d like to have a warm fuzzy’. You would then reach into your bag and pull out a Fuzzy the size of a little girl’s hand. Ass soon ass the Fuzzy saw the light of day it would smile and blossom into a large, shaggy warm Fuzzy. You would then lay it the person’s shoulder or head or lap and it would snuggle up and melt right against their skin and made them feel good all over. People were always asking each other for Warm Fuzzies, and since they were always given freely, getting enough was never a problem. There was always plenty to go around and as a consequence everyone was happy and felt warm and fuzzy most of the time.
One day a bad witch became very angry because everyone was so happy and no one was buying her potions and salves. This witch was very clever and she devised a wicked plan. On a beautiful morning she crept up to Tim while Mary was playing with their daughter and whispered in his ear ‘see here, Tim, look at all those fuzzies Mary is giving to Lucy. You know if she keeps on giving them away at that rate she is going to run pout and then there won’t be any left for you.’
Tim was astonished. He turned to the witch and said,’ do you mean to tell me that there isn’t a warm fuzzy in our bag every time we reach into it?’
And the witch said, ‘no, absolutely not, and once you run out, that’s it! You don’t have any more.’ With this she flew away on her broom, laughing and cackling hysterically.
Tim took this to heart and began to notice every time Mary gave up a Warm Fuzzy to somebody else. Eventually he got very worried and upset because he liked Mary’s warm fuzzies very much and did not want to give them up. He certainly did not think it was right for Mary to be spending all her warm fuzzies on the children and on other people. He began to complain every time he saw Mary giving a Warm Fuzzy to somebody else, and because Mary liked him very much, she stopped giving warm fuzzies to other people as often, and reserved them for him.
The children watched this and soon began to get the idea that it was wrong o give up warm fuzzies and time you were asked for one or felt like it. They too became very careful. They would watch their parents closely and when ever they felt their parents were giving away too many fuzzies to other people, they also began to object. They began to feel worried whenever they gave away too many fuzzies. Even though they found a warm fuzzy every time they reached into their bag, they reached in less and less and became more and more stingy. Soon people to notice the lack of warm fuzzies, and they began to feel less and less fuzzy. They began to shrivel up and occasionally people would die from the lack of them. More and more people went to the witch to buy her potions and salves even though they didn’t seem to work.
Well, the situation was getting very serious indeed. The bad witch who had been watching all of this didn’t really want the people to die so she devised a new plan. She gave everyone a bag that was very similar to the Fuzzy bag except this one was very cold. Inside the witches bag was cold pricklies. These cold pricklies did not make people feel warm and fuzzy, but made them feel cold and prickly instead. But, they did prevent peoples’ backs from shrivelling up. So from then on, every time somebody said, ‘I want a warm fuzzy’, people who were worried about depleting their supply would say, ‘I can’t give you a warm fuzzy, but would you like a cold prickly instead?’ Sometimes, two people would walk up to each other, thinking they could get a warm fuzzy, but one or other of them would change their mind and they would both end up giving each other cold prickles. So, the end result was that while very few people were dying, a lot of people were still unhappy and feeling very cold and prickly.
The situation got very complicated because, since the coming of the witch, there were less and less warm fuzzies about, so warm fuzzies, which used to be thought as free as air, became extremely valuable. This caused people to do all sorts of things in order to obtain them.
Before the witch had appeared, people used to gather in groups of three or four or five, never caring to much who was giving warm fuzzies to whom. After the coming of the witch, people began to pair of and reserve all their warm fuzzies for each other exclusively. If ever one of the two persons forgot themselves and gave a warm fuzzy to someone else, they would immediately feel guilty about it because he knew that their partner would probably resent the loss of a warm fuzzy. People who could not find a generous partner had to buy their warm fuzzies and had to work long hours to earn the money. Another thing that happened was that some people would take cold pricklies – which were limitless and freely available – coat them white and fluffy and pass them on as warm fuzzies. These counterfeit warm fuzzies were really plastic fuzzies, and they caused additional difficulties. For instance, two people would get together and exchange plastic fuzzies, which they thought would do them good but they came away feeling very bad instead. Since they thought they had been exchanging warm fuzzies, people grew very confused, never realising that their cold prickly feelings were really the result of the fact they had been given plastic fuzzies.
So the situation was becoming more and more dismal.
Not long ago a young woman with big hips born under the sign of Aquarius cam to this unhappy land. She had not heard about the bad witch and was not worried about running out of warm fuzzies. She gave them out freely, even when not asked. They called her the ‘hip woman’ and disapproved of her because she was giving the children the idea that they should not worry about running out of warm fuzzies. The children liked her very much because they felt good around her and they too began to give out warm fuzzies whenever they felt like it. The grown ups became concerned and decided to pass a law to protect the children from depleting their stocks of warm fuzzies.
The law made it a criminal, offence to give out warm fuzzies in a reckless manner. The children, however, seemed not to care, and in spite of the law they continued to give each other warm fuzzies whenever they felt like it and always when asked. Because there were many children, almost as many as grown ups, it began to look as if maybe hey would have their way.
As of now it is hard to say what will happen. Will the grown up forces of law and order stop the recklessness of the children? Are the grown ups going to join with the ‘hip woman’ and the children in taking a chance that there will always be as many warm fuzzies as needed? Will they remember the days their children are trying to bring back when warm fuzzies were abundant because people gave them away freely?
